My Reason for Living

Yesterday I learned about you.
I learned you were on your way.
I can only think of all the things we'll do.
Yesterday your mom made my day.

Tomorrow we'll know when your coming to meet us.
I can't wait until I can see your face.
Your mom tells me not to rush.
She's scared to bring you into this place.

Your mom has always had the warmest of hearts.
I worried she would realize I'm not worthy of her love.
Loving me has to be hard.
But for her I guess it was enough.

I couldn't have asked God for a better surprise.
But I'm scared I won't be everything you need.
Last night I sat up, I could already hear your cries.
I'll give you all the love I possess, I'll be all you want me to be.

God only knows when we're ready.
He'll keep you safe from harm.
My hands and heart will remain steady,
Until you steal me away with your charm.

I'll teach you everything I know.
We'll learn things together.
I hope our lives go by slow.
The longer I have with you, the better.

I'll always remember those 2 pink lines.
They've changed my life completely.
I can't get you off my mind.
I can't wait til you get to meet me.


I'll see you soon sweet baby.
With All My Love,
Daddy

Not My Time

I can see the bullet spiraling towards me.
I pulled the trigger with it held to my head.
Its too late to turn back now, I'm dead.

Who's gonna notice when I'm not around?
It happened so fast I didn't hear a sound.
It should be over.

Still I can feel the pain.
I can feel the one hundred and eighty grain.
It runs through my blood like fire on my skin.

The lead is hot as Hell.
I'm not sure if Heaven's calling me.
In this life there were many times I failed.

Now I hear voices of demons.
I'm wondering if Satan's freed them.
I see a flash of light.
My eyes are opening, the demons wear white.

I jerk away and realize I'm alive.
Why haven't I died?
The people in white cause me to fail once again.
They don't even know where I've been.

Strangers in my room call themselves family.
When I was well they only damned me.
I close my eyes and beg to be taken away.
A voice from a distance answers me,
Today is not your day.

Will everyone remain the same?
Will they continue to curse my name?
Words hurt as much as sticks and stones.
Sometimes they cut you to the bone.

Think when you move your hateful tongue.
You could be the reason someone dies young.

Look Ahead

I'm selfish, I'm not willing to share.
Time, no matter how long you get, its never fair.
Age, Its just a number given to us so we can determine our death.
Why exactly would I want to know when my body will be laid to rest?

You always get what you think you need.
No one knows appreciation like the man who works til his hands bleed.
I'm gonna be a father, But wait.
I'm too young, and apparently so is fate.

Maybe I'll drink.
But the more poison I put down my throat, the lower I sink.
Where is my pick me up?
She's left me for becoming a drunk.

It numbs the pain.
My mood begins to resemble the rain.
Dark, dreary, and more prone to disaster.
I find myself wishing life would pass me by faster.

A woman. One that will put you flat on your back.
She's beautiful, hair long and black.
She'll steal your heart.
But before you can blink your eyes, its all torn apart.

You'll go your separate ways.
Your paths cross in 1,825 days.
You both live different lives.
You wish you could go back to that year, wondering what happened to the last five.

Without ever thinking twice you'll walk.
Knowing you may never see her again, still you barely even talk.
Regret only what you've missed.
The future is new, temptation is all thats left to resist.

The devil wears the color pink.
A thirsty man always finds himself a drink.
Tear off that rear view mirror.
The road ahead is all you should fear.